The Gifts of Imperfection (2020)

Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are.

After years of studying, researching, and writing about vulnerability, shame, and fear, Brown noticed a pattern among the people who were living a “wholehearted” life through processing thousands of stories collected. After analyzing the data, realization that she wasn’t living a wholehearted life herself, Brown decided to do further research and create a guidebook to help people pursue the wholehearted life.

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I think it’s a fine line between embracing things I shouldn’t embrace and being okay with where I am right now. I think that I should strive to be better, and maybe Who I Am is not good enough. So, I admittedly bristled a bit at the subtitles there.

“The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are by Brene Brown is a book we all need to read. I admit, that whole thing about Who I Am vs. Who I Am Supposed to Be gets me every time.”

The Book Guide® Editor

According to Brown, “Wholehearted living is about engaging our lives from a place of worthiness. It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, ‘No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough.’ It’s going to bed at night thinking, ‘Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am also brave and worthy of love and belonging.’” 

To cultivate worthiness, we have to practice courage, compassion, and connection aka “The Gifts of Imperfection” daily. Brown states, “When we can let go of what other people think and own our story, we gain access to our worthiness. Our sense of worthiness is the important piece that gives us access to love and belonging, essential to human experience. If we want to fully experience love and belonging, we must believe that we are worthy of love and belonging.” Brown also delves into things that get in the way of wholehearted living, such as fear, shame, and disconnect more in depth in the book.

Through the research, Brown found ten common factors among the people who were living a “wholehearted” life (listed below). Each guidepost has a dig deep section. According to Brown, “dig-deep button is a secret level of pushing through when we’re exhausted and overwhelmed, and when there’s too much to do and too little time for self-care.” 

Brown found that the Wholehearted people dig deep differently – they get deliberate, inspired, and going. Brown does great job of explaining concepts, ideas, and research process, it all makes sense to me. What I really appreciate about the way she presents her work is it’s easy to grasp, understand, and applicable to real life. She’s also a great storyteller, combing research with her personal stories with honesty, candor, and warmth. She doesn’t just tell you what to do, but rather connect with you.

Maybe not everyone may like her approach, research, and work, but there’s so much to learn from her, and I find what she’s doing incredible important. And just bringing awareness and shining light on the difficult topics, we can start to have conversation, open up, and let go of some of the heavy burden of hiding ourselves. This book is a great start, and I hope she continues to do important researches and write books to help many people. I highly recommend this book. I believe there’s something beneficial for everyone.